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Convincing Someone That They’re Wrong

Tuesday, April 8th, 2014

Follow steps from the Inc.com article “How to Change Someone’s Mind” to complete the difficult task of convincing a person that what they think they know might not actually be the case. When someone has already decided that they know something for a fact, no matter how flimsy the proof, it’s very hard to change their minds. It’s not as simple as providing compelling evidence – once someone has made a decision, they’ll tend to mentally manipulate the evidence so that it supports their decision. To have a chance, you’ve got to be able to reframe the situation and allow the other person to save face. Try following these steps:

  1. Agree with them. First, establish some goodwill by agreeing with at least some part of the opposing argument, or acknowledging that their position is understandable, even if incorrect.
  2. Reframe the problem. Opinions are a mechanism of a certain way of looking at the issue. If you can alter the definition of the issue, even just a bit, you can remove some of the emotion from the equation so the person won’t feel as much need to defend their opinion just for the sake of being right.
  3. Introduce a new solution. Once the angle of the argument is altered, you can begin to introduce alternate resolution, being careful not to accuse the person of being wrong, but simply explaining the viability of a different point of view.
  4. Provide a way to “save face.” People don’t want to feel stupid, so they might be unwilling to back down even when it becomes clear that they’re wrong. So, in order to complete the change of mind, you’ve got to provide a dignified way for them to do it. In the case of a customer, it could mean offering them something of value, or it could just mean acting with grace – avoid acting smug, and position it as a common and reasonable misunderstanding.

Click here to read the article from Inc.com.

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